I know I talk a lot about overcoming the obstacles and how we shouldn’t let our disabilities rob us of our abilities. But the utter unpredictability of my current situation, has me bound with a chain. Heart wise I seem to be doing fine, no harm, no foul. But this is a new ailment that has slowly creeped up on me and pretty much taken over my life. I’ve spoken about it on the odd occasion, but now it’s really just pissing me off.
I can see opportunities coming up over the horizon. But this ailment has bound my hands, as much as my initial heart issues. The thing is till 2015 I worked my whole life. But just when I feel like dipping my toes back into the work pool again, Bam! I know, I know I should just let it go and flow with it; like I have on so many other occasions. But you know me, I’m not one to blow smoke up anyone’s ass. So I’ll be honest and say, I miss the daily grind of just being a normal person.
I know I should look at this as a growing period or some cosmic life lesson. But I’m just an ordinary guy, who tends to overthink things. I suppose if anything, I’m just tired and ready for a change. But I’m stuck here with what this life hands me, so I guess I’ll just “grin and bear it”. By continuing this journey of dropping my little words of “wisdom”.
I suppose I could take some perverse pleasure in the fact that the world is just as lost as I am. But what good would that do? The best any of us can do is pause, reflect, and ask ourselves, “Am I where I want to be”? Then learn to find a little moments of joy in each moment we live.