Being Who I Am
There are moments when I feel stuck. You know, stuck in my position in life, stuck in some bad situation, or just plain stuck in a moment. Being who I am, I can’t help but have a little pity party for myself. The kind where the world’s just not fair and everyone’s out to get me. It’s 2:38 in the morning, I was awakened from a sound sleep my body’s urge to pee. So to kill time before I reclaim my dreamland, I checked out a little Instagram. Scrolling through the images, I see the happy productive lives of my peers. And like a poison all those post were telling me nothing except I’ll never measure up.
Now I don’t mean to sow bad seed on those I follow. It’s just that at vulnerable moments like this, I feel like the rest of the world’s moving while I’m stuck in the moment. But if I think for a moment and look deeper into the relationships I’ve formed, I realize we all struggle. That there are times when we all have to give ourselves a little pep talk just to make through another day.
But again being who I am, the weeds of doubt and fear continue to bloom. I don’t care how much you may want your garden free of weeds. At some point you’re going the have to put in a little work and rake and hoe it out. Some prefer out to just stray their garden with poison for a quick fix. But doing so choke’s away much the life you’re actually trying to grow. So don’t feed yourself a constant diet of self-doubt and hatred. Rejoice at the accomplishments of you friends. Then be willing to put in the work to clean out your own plant beds.
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FD Thornton, Jr
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