Blue Skies

I am staring out at blue skies. What was once a quiet blue morning has quickly turned into gas fumes and loud lawn equipment next door at the EMC. It takes the three of the  more time to cut them three strips of grass than one 80 year old man that cuts my yard. But that is what you get for hiring 19 year old dropouts working for beer money. Believe me I know. Anyway, Buffy’s in my lap, she hates the racket too. So with the smell of a badly tuned weed eaters, I sit here and wait for these boys to get done mowing.

But at least I am outside after a week of rain and drizzle. With a good breeze blowing off that storm in the Carolinas. I got clothes hung out for the first time in days. While I’m  not fan of dryers (no 240v outlet) on weeks like this they would have been most appreciated. Still the leaves are beginning to fall, and autumn is just a few days away. There is nothing much going on in my head other than the bruises healing up on my arms. I guess like most people in my position it’s just get your chores done and find a hobby.

It is not like I would not want a regular job like everyone else. But there comes a point for some of us when you just can’t . Now even the casual things which I do have become hard. As a young person I never thought much about growing old. As a middle aged man I was far too busy working and being the single parent with a house full of kids and a spouse with special needs. But then it all changed. With all the stress of family responsibility, going to school, and working I finally just shut down. Now going on my ninth year of living on borrowed time, all I apparently have to show for it is, watching this youngin run a leaf blower against the wind. But between the blue skies and the clouds, I carry on. Apparently living to watch contractors speeding by my house and the smell of poorly mixed gasoline.