Ebenezer's Dream

FD Thornton

Rather it was the voice of fear or that uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach. I woke up suddenly in the middle of the night paralyzed with fear. I don’t know exactly what it was that shocked me awake. But whatever it was it’s got my heart beating a hundred miles a minute. I wasn’t breathing rapidly but I still pulled off my CPAP mask to take slow deep breaths to get my heart to calm down. It was then that I noticed my belly was making a lot of uncomfortable noises. So the working theory is now that I was awakened much like Ebenezer by a bad piece of meat.

Now that I’ve been able to calm down, I wish nothing more than to go back to bed. But the creative juices have already been stirred. So I’m forced to finish this thought and analyze these shards of panic just as I have done so many times before. But as I jot down these lines, the unwanted adrenaline rush turns to pure exhaustion. Like an overzealous prize fighter going down hard on the mat. So I take a few moments to rest while my bride quietly sleeps. Putting on that uncomfortable mask and impatiently go back to bed.

I awoke the next day a bit disoriented thinking that the day was Sunday. Even going as far as calling my father-in-law and wishing him a Good Sunday Morning. Only to have an 83 year old man remind me it was Saturday. So I got up and slashed some water on my face leaving my bed unmade. Only to end up in this office finishing up these damn thoughts from last night. After all the professional and self-analysis I’ve have or had performed over the years. Some things are just best left a mystery. Often there is no need to over analyze your life. It’s just best to leave life to chance, by accepting yourself as you are and appreciating what you have.