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Reminds Me

4/2/2020

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The school bus is scurrying about town dropping off meals to the new “latch key kids” of today. Our state hasn’t issued a mandatory quarantine. Still the schools are closed and the parents unable to stay at home are making due as best they can. The abrupt change in all our lives is a bit crazy. But looking down the street it doesn’t look any different than any other day. 

I had to run errands today, paying bills, picking up prescriptions, and doing a little shopping. The stores were full of “high risk” individuals, such as myself. Cleaning out store shelves and buying cases of toilet paper. I went to stock up on items for my carnivore’s meat, meat, and more meat. It’s funny to find myself so anxious while going through the store. It reminds me of when I was first diagnosed with panic disorder. During the first few years after my initial diagnosis, I developed severe agoraphobia. So it was interesting to once again have those particular feelings of anxiety again. 
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But it is what it is, so as I sit outside in the cool air, I’m reminded of how the human mind works. When some days simply run into others and where our focus is on working and tending to our own business. Thereby never giving a second thought that our actions have consequences. Then there are those of us that have our eyes so focused on the negative that we even fear our own shadows. But either way these two extremes are unhealthy and can lead to unbalance. Be mindful of the world around you. Be compassionate to the suffering of others and realize fear is a powerful tool that often leads to hate. 
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