Resignation

It’s one of those days where its nice outside, yet I just want to stay in my hole. Outside my windows I can see a light breeze blowing the young leaves on the pecan trees. The ceiling fan above me is giving a good imitation of how it must feel outside. But yet I just feel defeated from the events from yesterday involving a rent increase I was told wouldn’t be. But that’s water under the bridge now, cause what the man wants, the man gets. So I sit here, not so much in misery as I am in resignation over the things I can’t control.

In life it’s usually one thing or another. I would like to think maybe I’m just part of the wrong generation. Where I was raised to focus on the world around me, instead of trying to wrap my head around everything going on everywhere…at the same time. Or maybe it’s much simpler than that where I’m suffering from yet another unexpected blow involving my life and my peace of mind. I just think that it’s unfair not to be able to plan one minute to the next. If it’ not surprising new bills showing up, it’s yet another out of the blue doctor’s appointment to absorb my time and my fuel budget.

So I guess I’m through whining and bitching about my sad little life. Where despite all the inconveniences I still have a roof over my head and a home that isn’t falling down around my feet. And doctors that actually seem concerned about my wellbeing. So here’s to all of you that have your shit together, pray for us weary ones that are always looking for the next shoe to drop. I don’t know how y’all do it, but then again maybe I’m just too honest for my own damn good.