I figured by the end of the day; I’ll be apologizing to a lot of people. You see two days ago; I ran out of one of my mental health medications. It’s one of those you don’t notice until you run out of it. In my case without it I get more irritable, anxious, and a lot less patient with others. It wasn’t until after lunch that I finally got my prescription refilled. So at the moment I’m shut up in my room waiting for the meds to kick in.
There are a lot of people out there that either say you’re weak for depending on medication. Or that relying on doctors and medication simply means you’re not, “Putting your trust in the Lord”. Well I tried both, so I guess I'm just a whimpering puss that doesn’t have any faith. But don’t worry I don’t put a lot of trust in man either. But I do trust myself. So after years of living a miserable life, I’ve learned that the highway to conformity isn’t for everyone. That among the masses there are some of us that take the road less traveled. That we understand that our goals and purpose in life isn’t like anyone else’s.
And you know what? That’s okay. I know I need money to survive in this consumer driven world. But money is not my driver. I understand that a strong positive attitude is needed, just to make it through the day. But I embrace my flaws and give them a voice. If for nothing else but to maintain my sanity and to not allow myself to be overcome by self-hatred. For me life is a daily journey. One in which I listen to my turmoil, forgive, and learn from it. Through weakness I understand my limits. Through my limits I find a pathway through. Breathe in the essence of life, don’t let hearsay and judgement limit you. Find peace in what’s around you, know that satisfaction may be a lot simpler than you think.
All post written by
FD Thornton, Jr
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