It's three in the morning I had what I could only describe as a detailed bad dream. It ran along the themes of an earlier dream I had about a week ago. That dream dealt with the inadequacies I felt from living here in the new apartment. In this dream I lived through a series of events between myself and the ruling class of the gilded age. In this dream my family and I lived and worked for a wealthy victorian family living in opulence, while my family lived in what could only be described as a slum from a Dickens novel.
Much like a Dickens novel, the dream was richly detailed. To the point that I thought it was actually brought on by something I had eaten, much like Ebenezer. It had vivid details of gilded decor and shining hardwood floors. But hidden away from the hallowed halls of the manor were the shameful layers of dirt and feces that cover the poor. Needless to say, this awaken me causing me wonder, what does this all mean? Much like Scrooge, it may be nothing more than a bit of undigested piece of meat. But now sitting at the keyboard, I really think it is something more than than just a piece of spoiled meat.
Hidden deep in our souls are all the inadequacies we’ve gathered over our lives. Places we seldom tread, but yet still influence our everyday decisions. Everything from putting ourselves in unnecessary debt, to working ourselves to death just to look successful. From marrying the wrong person just because we think we can fix them. To tearing ourselves down so much that it becomes the only way we know. I lived these lives and it’s quite apparent I also live them through my dreams.
For me, the easiest way to free myself from these chains is to speak about them openly. Through mindfulness I’ve gained an understanding that when my inner child is hurting. It’s hurting from past trauma and future worry. The best way to escape this is by acknowledging those traumas and by embracing them with love and compassion. I have to remind myself daily to focus on the here and now. To seek help when i need it and put away my meaningless stoic attitude. And remembering that life flows like the timing of nature, and that patience and determination creates the eternal rhythm of life.
Much like a Dickens novel, the dream was richly detailed. To the point that I thought it was actually brought on by something I had eaten, much like Ebenezer. It had vivid details of gilded decor and shining hardwood floors. But hidden away from the hallowed halls of the manor were the shameful layers of dirt and feces that cover the poor. Needless to say, this awaken me causing me wonder, what does this all mean? Much like Scrooge, it may be nothing more than a bit of undigested piece of meat. But now sitting at the keyboard, I really think it is something more than than just a piece of spoiled meat.
Hidden deep in our souls are all the inadequacies we’ve gathered over our lives. Places we seldom tread, but yet still influence our everyday decisions. Everything from putting ourselves in unnecessary debt, to working ourselves to death just to look successful. From marrying the wrong person just because we think we can fix them. To tearing ourselves down so much that it becomes the only way we know. I lived these lives and it’s quite apparent I also live them through my dreams.
For me, the easiest way to free myself from these chains is to speak about them openly. Through mindfulness I’ve gained an understanding that when my inner child is hurting. It’s hurting from past trauma and future worry. The best way to escape this is by acknowledging those traumas and by embracing them with love and compassion. I have to remind myself daily to focus on the here and now. To seek help when i need it and put away my meaningless stoic attitude. And remembering that life flows like the timing of nature, and that patience and determination creates the eternal rhythm of life.
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