Windows Closed

Adobe Firefly 3

My neighbors across the fence at the independent church are keeping my windows closed with their lawnmowers and weed eaters. Trying to gussy up the backyard of the church which I’ve never seen anyone use. I mean, I know people attend the church by all the cars I’ve seen parked out front. It’s just that I’ve never really seen any more than that. You’d figure we’d be a prime target for a church given the large number of children living here. But from my vantage point I’ve haven’t seen a church bus or van.

Who knows what got me thinking about this, other than the lawnmowers. It’s just that with most every church I ever attended, there was always some local program to build attendance. Of course this kind of talk would shock my daughter and son-in-law who are very involved with their church. Considering how much of a cynical heathen I am. But after devoting a good chunk of my young adult life to “spreading the gospel”. That part of my life as with most everything else has long retired. But it hasn’t stopped me from thinking about those with less. Maybe not so much with money or opportunity, but with an abundance of love and compassion.

For a long time I dreamed of being part of something greater. Of being part of something greater that would help my “fellow man”. But instead I got caught up in my own self-absorbed need for peace. Keeping up appearances and pretending to be okay. It’s been a long journey, one that I still tend as an imperfect man. But sometimes I’m reminded that despite all that, I still follow a code that keeps me holding things together. So despite whatever prejudices I might hold toward organized mass religion. I forgive myself for my cynism, while forgiving others of their hypocrisy of replacing servitude with pep rallies.