Well it’s only been a few days since our latest grandchild was born. But she’s already seen… well, heard the wrath of my anxiety attacks. After a number years of being able keep my anxiety demons at bay, they exploded in a big way. Without dwelling of the politics of it, I was out of line with some people. Thankfully though our grandbaby seemed unfazed by the incident. Preferring instead to focused on the ride home and getting fed.
I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder back in 1999, along with Panic Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, with a good dose of clinical depression. Over the years I’ve chronicled my adventures, from the first time I had a panic attack as a correctional officer. To the moments where I was so paralyzed by fear I couldn’t get out of bed. Surely but slowly I’ve gotten better by using medication, therapy, and mindfulness training to keep my fears in check. But my fears have gotten the best of me yet again. So it’s needless to say, I’ll be going on yet another apology tour with my family.
But for the moment I’m just going to lay low and take it easy. That’s because my mental health has always had a direct effect on my physical health. So I need to give myself some time to heal. These have been some of the worst episodes of anxiety I’ve had in a while. So I’ll be checking in with my PCP next week and let her know what’s going on. Till then I’m taking it easy, running simple errands and taking care of the house. It’s not really the running around that stresses me, as much as the vibe I can pick up off others. But peace is found in the unassuming and knowing when to let go.
I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder back in 1999, along with Panic Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, with a good dose of clinical depression. Over the years I’ve chronicled my adventures, from the first time I had a panic attack as a correctional officer. To the moments where I was so paralyzed by fear I couldn’t get out of bed. Surely but slowly I’ve gotten better by using medication, therapy, and mindfulness training to keep my fears in check. But my fears have gotten the best of me yet again. So it’s needless to say, I’ll be going on yet another apology tour with my family.
But for the moment I’m just going to lay low and take it easy. That’s because my mental health has always had a direct effect on my physical health. So I need to give myself some time to heal. These have been some of the worst episodes of anxiety I’ve had in a while. So I’ll be checking in with my PCP next week and let her know what’s going on. Till then I’m taking it easy, running simple errands and taking care of the house. It’s not really the running around that stresses me, as much as the vibe I can pick up off others. But peace is found in the unassuming and knowing when to let go.
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