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Dark Room

7/25/2022

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For the last few months I’ve been spending way too much time in my own head. Due to the heat it’s nearly impossible for me to spend any time outside. And as you may know, outside is my refuge, my place of release. But when the temperatures are in the mid-90’s and the dew points over 70°f nearly every day. Spending more than a few minutes outside becomes a chore in itself. So I’m dictated by fate and my current health, to spend my days confined to a very dark room.

Along with the heat the economy has taken is toll on our standard of living. Food prices I can adjust to by changing menus options. But the gas prices have really burned us out. With gas prices increasing some 50-60% and the increased number of doctor visits I’m making. Bills are falling behind and predatory lending has become a way of life. I’m sure most of you are uncomfortable talking about such things. But I figure in my “absolute candor” too many of us suffer in silence. So I might as well be honest. But I’m not writing this as some political statement, for I am a believer we create your own choices. My point is at this time life is really weighting down on my head.
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So what are my options? Right now I’m laying here with a light blanket and an ice pack on my head, venting my fears and frustrations onto this tiny screen. Rather that helps or not remains to be seen. But over the decades I’ve seen that by facing the fear and discomfort, I’m unburdening myself of grief and pain. To ignore something is no way of escape it. But it is a way of compressing that pressure till eventually it explodes, and believe me I know all about that. Do what you can to repair whatever situation you may have. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. But mostly be honest with yourself and know that sometimes a dark room maybe all you got. So use it. 
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    FD Thornton, Jr  
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