Days Pining Away

Up late like my yesterday’s, spaced between the hint of alcohol and the dull scent of a cigarette. Pretending with such the sophistication, but bearing the brunt of not knowing a damn thing. Sitting in the company of others not unlike my own. Thinking I knew everything as I drew breath from that stagnate paper tube. Unwilling or unable to see into the future or at least a future beyond the next day.

With boundless energy we danced with heated emotions. Taking some things way too serious while tossing real feelings aside. Yes, we were young. Far too young to see into a future where compromise and defeat carry such a weighted price. Where life dangles a carrot of better days, only to snatch them away.

So why travel into yet more uncharted terrain pretending we know better. When we really don’t. Pretending all our wisdom has taught us something, when really it hasn’t. But in that last breath of pause discovering there is an end. With no bright light at the end of the tunnel …only fear. So I vowed to myself I seek the truth. A greater lesson than I was taught in school. That happiness is a real and far simpler thing than we make it out to be. Where days of pining away for something better are only achieved through pause and appreciation.