Defeated

Defeated, how can I put it any plainer. I know that people don’t like to hear words like that, it brings them down, makes them sad, or forces them to look at their own situations. But that’s just how it is. This is looking to be a bad month, the end of the year bills are pouring in and impending medical test are looming. It’s shit like this that creates stress where stress is already at a premium. 

I really don’t enjoy spilling all this crap onto this page. I’d much rather talk of “taking lemons and making lemonade”. But I was always told confession is good for the soul. For the first 40 or so years of my life I bottled up every worry, every anxiety. And what did it get me? Years of taking antidepressants, more trips to the psychiatric clinic then I care to remember, and decades of hiding my shame. So if I make you uncomfortable reading this, well welcome to my world.
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Despite sounding a really shitty motivational speaker, this too shall past. There are so many motivational gurus out there to are selling nothing but “snake oil” cures for real world problems. I’m not saying my way is the only way. Lord knows, I’m not that arrogant or stupid. What I am saying is, look within yourself. Listen to what your heart is saying. If somethings wrong, then somethings wrong. The stresses of life are real, and they will eventually cause you harm. So find your truth, use avenues of relief that are comfortable and uplifting. Be your own best advocate but seek help when needed.