It’s funny how the highs and lows of life work themselves out. Just a few days ago I was writing about how happy my doctor was with my progress. My blood pressure, A1C, and weight were looking good. But then my lab work comes back and my GP needs to wants to consult with my cardiologist to see what they want to do medication wise. My life often seems like a perpetual rollercoaster ride between doing well and getting worse.
I often bring up my mental health issues and how they play a part in my overall well being. It’s just all the waiting that makes the anxiety roll all over me. I can’t get an appointment with my cardiologist till July. So it puts me in yet another holding pattern of wonder and worry. It seemed so much easier when I just had heart issues. Now the cure is becoming the illness. But I do what I do, and jot down my emotions on this damn screen. Hoping to at least talk myself down. As much as I like to tell people not to give up, I can’t seem to get the gum off my own shoe. But ain’t that the way it is, talking is so much easier than listening most of the time. All we can do is mosey through life doing the best we can. That doesn’t mean we give up, it just means putting one foot in front of the other till we reach our goals.
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May 2023
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