Well it’s mid-afternoon and with all my errands run I decided to put on my night clothes and chill. Outside it’s foggy and drizzly, so I’m just sitting here on the bed waiting for a spark of inspiration. It’s funny getting used to typing on a full-size keyboard again. For the last few years, I’ve gotten used to pecking away at the tiny keyboard on my phone when writing my stories. But for my birthday my oldest brought me a new laptop with all the “bells and whistles” attached. It seems a little extreme for a minimalist like me to be using such a fancy thing. But today I’m forcing myself to enjoy my new luxury item (insert eyeroll here).
It feels a little intimidated using this thing. Not trying to make myself sound like a saint, but I’m one of those people that puts everyone and everything in front of themselves. For the last 35 years, it’s been mostly up to me to making sure things got done around the house. So when something nice happens for me, I’m always waiting for the other shoe to literally drop. But so far no disasters have occurred and it’s just me and Buffy the cat chilling here with the keyboard.
Life can be very exhausting, especially in a world where no good deed goes unpunished. But despite my cynical, laissez-faire mask survival is my mantra. It’s a skill just born out of necessity to protect others as well as myself. But over the last several years, physical and mental wear has whittled away at my ability to be an effective caregiver. What I’m learning though is that the gift of giving often comes back to you. My adult children have really stepped up over the years to help me and their mother both physically and financially. As a parent and caregiver, it’s often hard to accept such help. But in the process of living mindfully setting examples is usually not overlooked, especially by those you love.