Hazardous Waste

Sandra Saxon Burnsed

It’s just one of those days. Not much on the agenda, maybe watch a little football, go to the store and pick up some things, that’s about it. I suppose I should just keep my mouth shut and go with the flow. But that ain’t my style. Because I’ve had some really weird dreams lately. Mostly about me parents and grandparents, you know the ghosts in our lives. Nothing horrible or tragic, just memories and dreams.

I’m sure other people dream the same thing, about pleasant or maybe unpleasant things from their past. Strange how those things work, you think you’ve sweep things under the rug. Only to rediscover they are right there where you left them. Maybe that’s way I’m having “one of those days”. Before I would bury deep the emotional garbage, I kept inside myself. Only to discover that much like hazardous waste it eventually seeps out and poisons everything.

Relief came through creating an honest dialog with myself. By facing the things that were hurting me and listening to the pain. I learn to give yourself a little compassion. So many times, we “guilt ourselves to death” for the things we have done.
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To forgive yourself and to ask forgiveness of others, is the first step to a greater understanding of who we are. Life is so much more than just a paycheck or shiny new things. It’s about living in the moment and taking the happiness we feel and spreading it around. Don’t continue to live your life drowning in your own poison water. Breathe. Forgive. Dream.