I'm Hurting

It’s too late in the afternoon to take a nap. Besides I know for a fact that I’ll be fixing supper tonight. So I’m laying here on the bed feeling a little out of whack. My left eye is still sore and my muscles are twitching ever so slightly, which more than anything it makes typing this a bit of a chore. Then on top of everything else my side and upper back are cramping. I know, I know I should stop complaining and think positive thoughts. But oftentimes pain is just that…pain. So despite my best efforts I’m hurting.

When dealing with health anxiety, no matter how much you recognize the signs of an attack. You can’t help but succumb to it’s effects from time to time. Just this morning one of my morning pills decided to linger in my throat. This can cause a considerable amount of discomfort down my throat and into my stomach. But if I hadn’t paid attention to what was happening, my mind would automatically gone to thinking it was chest pains. It’s an acknowledgment kinda thing. There are moments, like now, where I feel like a trapped animal with way to escape. It’s in these moments when I slip into acceptance mode and do my best to ride out the storm.
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Often, at least for me, there’s no escaping bad decisions or poor judgement. But I like to think that my motives were good. So I do my damnest to trust that time and a little good karma will turn the tide. Acceptance of a situation often pulls the blinders from my eyes. Opening me up to new experiences and answers to the questions that are buried deep. Even now as I write this I feel a certain amount of peace. Knowing that most any situation can be overcome with acceptance, awareness, and understanding of what it is and who you are.