Life's Interuptions

Amidst the drama in which I don’t live, the calm often allows my mind to obsess over the most mundane things. Then those stresses bring up old fears like my health anxiety and depression. It’s funny to be so self-aware of your fears and yet still feel helpless to do nothing about them. Still with all my ailments and phobias flaring up at same time. Just sitting in the backyard listening to the birds, while the rest of the world zooms by with its own problems. Pleasantly reminds me, I am not totally alone.

Still what’s sadder watching others totally ignore their pain, or being totally aware yet helpless to do anything about it? I struggle with the latter on a nearly daily basis. Dreaming up solutions to many problems, yet not having the energy to follow through. Some of you may say that’s just an excuse to be lazy, and for all I know you maybe you’re right. But for all the years I struggled to right this ship and create a successful life. I’d always end up reverting back into panic mode just to survive.

So that leaves me here, trying to clear my throat of the early pollen before my eyes. But then right before my eyes, a small finch flies by tirelessly looking for food. While a distant woodpecker taps on trees to build shelter. My AI Writing Assistant often tells me to be more focused or you know, more positive with my stories. But sometimes even with the answer staring you right in the face. The motivation or the willingness to do anything just ain’t there. That’s when I remember to forgive yourself and rely on my faith and determination to make it through. Often when the heart is mired in pain. Taking a moment to clear your thoughts and to absorb what nature is saying helps to renewed our strength. Reminding us that the moments always flow, despite life’s interruptions.