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Nasty Old Booger

10/14/2023

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It’s another drizzly day in the neighborhood. We’re still fighting the wrap around from the lower pressure that’s blown through the past two days. But the weatherman claims brighter, and drier days are ahead by the weekend. In a few hours I have a video conference with my orthopedic surgeon about my MRI results. Hopefully we’ll learn a little something about which way her team wants to go as far as treatment. Other than that, I was spoiled by the nice dry weather we had last week and I’m looking forward to seeing it again. 
 
It's always been easy for me to focus (obsess) about my health. It was always something I felt I could control. But when it comes to matters of my mental health, I’m often not as confident. Oh, I put on a good show of strength about it, but that nasty old booger has a way of just getting under my skin. In the past it seemed like every time I overcame a particular mental tick. My panic or my depression would come up with a whole new plan of attack. It’s like when I’d overcome one particular fear, and not long afterwards another would take its place.
 
At the moment an old fear has been creeping up my backside. Causing me to have the most vivid and anxious dreams I’ve had in quite a while. The solution is always the same, wait it out and breathe through it. But the “man-up” part of my brain wants to attack the enemy. Which “nine times out of ten” leads to even more trouble up ahead. So what do you do? Give in to does same old habits and run through that cycle again? Or do I focus on what I can change and work towards bettering myself? The answer may seem easy, but in reality it is not. I’ve been working on my mental wellness going on 25 years and frankly, I’m pretty damn sure I’ll be working on it till the day I die. All I’m saying if a simpleton from the flatwoods of Georgia can try and do better, so can you.  

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