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Notice It or Not

5/16/2021

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I know I should be more positive, but as I’ve said before, I’m a realist. Now last night was a fairly decent night, didn’t have get up but once. But this morning, right from the start, I just knew it wasn't going to be a good day. I would have much rather stayed in bed, but medicine and other obligations forced me to get up and go.
 
At the moment several hours later, the heating pad is my best friend. I wouldn’t say I’m disappointed with myself, it’s just that I’ve learned to accept things as the come. I quit getting mad at myself for having bad days a long time ago. Because bad days are just a part of life. Although I sometimes still get mad at myself for wasting time. But as long as I’m aware of those moments, can I really call them wasted?
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So I lay here in bed, taken my afternoon pills; my daily obligations mostly complete. Acceptance may sound like an excuse to some. But in the grand scheme of things, it’s all we ever got. I watch time far more closely than I use to. I see the world in far more detail. It’s unfortunate that it took me so long to become this aware. Because my poor health has certainly taken its toll. But I don’t mean for this to be a sad story. Just a cautionary tale, of how life will past you by, rather you notice it or not. 
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