I’m not much into holidays, I suppose living in poverty does that to you. But the bitterness and envy of those emotions have given way to simply living in the moment. Still things like birthdays, Christmas, and New Year’s don’t hold much importance for me. Considering the time of year, I see a lot of people making resolutions and promises to themselves to do better. For me that never worked, because I lived such a life of self-hatred. That whenever I failed at a promise it would send me into a downward spiral of self-punishment and self-deprecation.
Making vision boards and swearing to do better is all fine and well. But for me it was taking very small steps and a lot of outside encouragement that pushed me forward. My mind is so ingrained with self-hatred that I’m still not good at receiving praise and gratitude. But I’ve learned that planting little seeds of encouragement can often give others that little nudge they need. Those of you that know me or at least have received messages from me, know that I do my best to be sincere and encouraging. Although with a dash of “American Humor”.
I suppose the point I’m making here is, nudge each other with words of encouragement. It’s so easy to be cynical and critical and believe me I know. In the background in which I was raised it was either grow a thick skin or die from self-pity. And unfortunately, I haven’t strayed too far from my raising. But I’m trying to do better and like anything worth doing it’s going to take time. So during this holiday season (which I’m not much about). Be kind to others, especially to yourself. Because seeds of goodness when given freely, are never wasted.
Making vision boards and swearing to do better is all fine and well. But for me it was taking very small steps and a lot of outside encouragement that pushed me forward. My mind is so ingrained with self-hatred that I’m still not good at receiving praise and gratitude. But I’ve learned that planting little seeds of encouragement can often give others that little nudge they need. Those of you that know me or at least have received messages from me, know that I do my best to be sincere and encouraging. Although with a dash of “American Humor”.
I suppose the point I’m making here is, nudge each other with words of encouragement. It’s so easy to be cynical and critical and believe me I know. In the background in which I was raised it was either grow a thick skin or die from self-pity. And unfortunately, I haven’t strayed too far from my raising. But I’m trying to do better and like anything worth doing it’s going to take time. So during this holiday season (which I’m not much about). Be kind to others, especially to yourself. Because seeds of goodness when given freely, are never wasted.
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