The water spickets are dripping waiting for tonight’s freeze. It’s been a colder than usual December around here. We usually don’t get this cold a weather till late January or February. But I got the sun to my back, so it doesn’t feel as cold as it is. My mind dances around thoughts between what I want to do and what I’m capable of doing. Sometimes it’s a bitter chain tied around your neck, when you dream dreams and are yet acutely aware.
So I dance this dance with myself. Doling out advice and encouragement to others, like penny candy from Grandma’s purse. Not that I don’t like penny candy, it’s just sometimes I feel a bit hypocritical saying those things. When I’m sitting here in a stationary position. Maybe I remind myself that each situation is different. That one man’s medicine can be other man’s poison. Then again, maybe I’m just making up for all those cynical and insulting words that flowed from my mouth. Whatever the reason, I sit here and little like John Lennon “Watching the Wheels”. Working on what I can, and accepting what I can’t. I know that may sound defeatist, but at least it’s honest. The road to perfection is a slippery slope, especially when you place so much pressure on yourself to win. So that eventually when you do stumble, it knocks you down so far, you may never get up again. So I’ve learned to just breathe, then accept, and continue on my journey.
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May 2023
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