I’ll be honest with you, I’m cold as hell. It’s currently 48° (8°C) and I’m sitting outside. God knows why, I could be under the covers with Buffy (the cat) by my side. But no! Here I am outside on a sunny but blustery day freezing my ass off. Sometimes shocks to the system are often the best ways to shake things up. We often find ourselves so accepting of the norm, that we forget change can be good.
For the past few weeks I have been going through a rough patch. Just seeing things in a negative light. Worrying about things that aren’t worth worrying about. Working myself up into a lather that wasn’t even worth washing. Now that I’m pulling out of this funk, my mind is going in a different direction. I’m focusing more on my own well being. As my family grows and expands, the expectations I placed on myself are lessening. Giving me more time to focus on my own needs. I know it sounds selfish, and goes against every core belief drilled into my head. But there comes a point when you have to take care of yourself wholly. For decades I had to put the needs of others above myself. While this form of self-sacrifice is noble; it often causes more problems than it does benefits. It’s like looking into a beautiful cloudless sky, then hearing the noise of a leaf blower going next door. Remember there’s no shame in thinking of yourself. There’s plenty of room in your soul for everyone least we forget.
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March 2023
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